New Cardiff Blues chief executive Richard Holland has held an emergency press conference to dampen recent speculation about the region leaving Cardiff City Stadium and returning to Cardiff Arms Park.

With a local Catholic Priest at his side, Holland revealed to the assembled media that the famous old ground is haunted by the anguished apparition of an old Cardiff fan.

“The ghoul is dressed in black and blue cotton,” said Holland in a hushed tone.  “He keeps screaming something about being damned by ‘Peter’, ‘Saint Peter’ or ‘Peters’.  I don’t quite understand what he says.  It could mean many things. The main thing is he is really scary and he smells of Brains.  Either way, for that reason there is no possible way we could therefore return to the Arms Park. Sorry.”

The claim follows the 2010 statement by the Blues marketing department saying there had been an awful flood, earthquake and gas leak which had ruined the ground for the ‘foreseeable future’.  When that claim was thrown into doubt club officials blamed a clerical error for the statement and revealed in fact the region could not return to Cardiff Arms Park as there was a family of white tigers living in the stands and it would be against wildlife laws to remove them.

However, news of the haunting failed to daunt the expectation of Cardiff fan John Costner.  “Either we take our chances with the ghosts,” said the 45 year-old fan, “Or we become ghosts ourselves.”

Some media officials, however, claim that if the reported ghost could be persuaded to move to Cardiff City Stadium on matchday it would boost attendance figures by nearly five percent. 

Taken from 

The East Terrace Blog

Captured on 29th October 2016